It's been a week in Beijing and so far it's been great! My neighbours have pretty much adopted me, they invite me to their family sundays and have me over for dinner every weeknight (she just calls when dinner is ready). It's a family of three, the dad is a workaholic, the mom (I call her Ah Yi which means Auntie) is a retired, most kind-hearted lady, and the daughter is a fun college kid.
Ah Yi and her daughter came up to my apartment this afternoon to bring me some groceries (yes, she even gets me picks me up stuff from the market). From day one, Ah Yi took it upon herself to steer my future for me with endless suggestions. Anyhow, for some reason the topic marriage came up. She took on the role of a wise woman who has gone the whole nine yards and said to me "I don't think you should get married, you should just find a good job, explore the world, and stay single." "Have fun, date around but don't settle."
Truthfully, she is not the first person that has advised being single is the way to go. Two years ago I spoke to a friend that was turning 33, she said late 20s and early 30s have been the best years thus far and that being single made it what it is/was. About 3 others have advised me along similar lines.
It's kind of scary that people give me such advice. I'm a hopeless romantic and I love the thought of family (though I'm definitely not ready for one right now!). Every now and then I'll imagine myself in a meadow for a spring picnic with my family --my husband and I (probably with a glass of wine in hand) laying on a red-white checkered blanket with a picnic basket as we watch our kids run around and fill the fresh air with innocent laughter. That always makes me happy. Although periodically (usually when I'm frustrated with a boyfriend or when I hear about failed marriages), I do think about staying single forever and that when I am financially capable of raising kids, I wouldn't mind being a single mom.
Well when I get to that point in my life, I hope I can see that the grass is much greener on my side, no matter where I am.
Labels: family, relationships